PHB Week 4 Recap
Hello and welcome to Hoff's Hot Takes. Today's Takes are brought to you by Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuits, Gatorade, and Insomnia. Fuck the intro, lets just get right into the interview with the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah.
This week's interview is with George. George is my favorite person who has the last name Patterson. Lets hear some thoughts on some things. Congrats on the house.
Jordan: What is your favorite Boy Band song?
George: My favorite boy band song is "Backstreet's Back". Easy to sing. Random Yelling. Killer horror movie themed video that doesn't make sense. Love it.
Jordan: What is something that is generally disliked/hated but you deep down like?
JB: Other than JB? haha. How about Monday's. People hate them. It has always been my day off, and there is football and wrestling on. Giddy up.
Jordan: What movie do you think you have spent the most minutes of your life watching?
George: It is a close race between Ferris Bueller, Blues Brothers, and National Treasure. Lets go with National Treasure. If it is on TV, it is a must stop for me.
Jordan: What is your go to pasta order?
George: Like a good tomato Basil pasta. Simple and easy. (editors note: just like George)
Jordan: Mt. Rushmore of sports jerseys?
George: The Blackhawks red jerseys. Atlanta Hawks 90's throwback in red. Seattle Seahawks. Yankees.
Thanks to George for participating. George has a whopper of a week. Whopper of the week sponsored by Burger King. Get 10 spicy nuggets for $1.49 for a limited time only. Here is a she shed secret - George is good. Jorge beats Miggy in a high scoring affair. George was helped by the Buccaneers and Rams just deciding to not play defense, with Gurley, Kupp, and Godwin combining for 85 points. I like George to go on a little run here with a deep team during these bye weeks. Mike can hang his head high with a point, but also be crushingly defeated because he got trampled in a good week. Both 2nd place, and most points scored and hasn't had a 3 point week yet. Schrodinger's Mike. Mike has Brady on his bench who he can pair with a player to upgrade a position. Pats had a good game against the Bills this Sunday. And Much like Harper's Ferry, John Brown got stopped short of the goal.
Like Jackie Treehorn, the Player Haters' Ball is logjammin this week. We have four teams tied for first place, and three teams tied for second. This paragraph is over, I just wanted to get a Jackie Treehorn reference in there.
Nick and Beej had a game. Of all the games this week, this was one of them. At 0-4, Beej has to start thinking towards the future. Thielen, Woods, Mike Williams, and Lockett all could get 3-6 round picks, and he would be able to set the non Travis Kelce trade market. Thompson, Olsen, and his San Francisco running backs would be valuable for teams during bye weeks for 7-9 round picks. Even Jameis could help somebody.... Nick is a really good 10th place team. He will always be in it with Kerryon and Zeke. Another TD for Farm Boy TJ as well. Here is a fun fact for you : DK Metcalf does not have a period between the letters in his name. DK is short for DeKaylin.
Don't look now, but Peter has won two straight, and gets Melvin Gordon back. He also will get Tyreek Hill back sometime soon. This was the closest game of the year, as Jordan lost by .5. If Peter can get Marlon Mack and Josh Gordon going, we got ourselves a team perhaps. Peter started some guy whose name on the app is T. Quinn, which sounds like the name of your dentist. Terry Quinn, DDS.
Jordan and Peter was the closest game of the week, and the second closest was Joe v Tidwell. This game is the second closest game of the year as well, separated by 1.2 points. Gallman filled in nicely for Saquon, but he has Minnesota and New England the next two weeks, which is not ideal. Tidwell is another team I expect to stay near the top during the bye weeks Dalvin Cook is good, and as long as he is healthy, is a top 5 RB.
Random thoughts from JB vs. Nolan : John loses to Johnny Fake Chow in a close game. A lot of close games this week... If JB didn't start a D/ST he would have won the game...Slick Willy Dissley could be a good pickup for Nolan as him and Russell have a real good rapport. I enjoy that Nolan's picture avatar is still the butt fumble. Looks like JB will be rolling with Danny Dimes for the time being... Leonard Fournette was a man, and if he gets goin, Nolan could get an easy bye into the playoffs.
Jordan also loses King of the Hill this week. Back to back weeks of dick punch eliminations coupled with close loses for Tidwell and Jordan. Jordan is out with 96.5 points. Elininated : Beej, Peter, Tidwell, Jordan. Still in Play: Nick, JB, Micah, Kyle, Mike, Nolan, Joe, George.
Random Shit : The Redskins D third down defense gives up a first down 87% of the time! They just put in Haskins, and go against the Pats this week... Sony Michel has not broken one tackle this entire season... Week 4 was the lowest scoring week this season for the league... Patrick Mahomes had 21 points this week without a TD....Jared Goff had the worst fantasy day for anybody who has ever thrown over 500 yards...Brady had his worst game since 2006.... Week 5 games of note are Mike vs Joe and JB vs George....Pats D is the 10th highest scoring fantasy player this season...Don't let JB's 3-1 record fool you, he has faced the least amount of points by 52....
Week 5 predictions - Tidwell, Mike, Peter, George, JPH, Stoner. Miggy with 3.
Current Standings : George, Berrones, Jordan, Tidwell, JB, Joe
ESPN Playoff Projections : Nolan, George, Mike, Joe, Jordan, JB
Hoff's Hot Takes Playoff Projections: Nolan, Joe, George, Mike, Tidwell, Jordan